Lies
I’m not a big fan
of myself lying, not to say I haven’t lied or that I don’t lie every now and
then (though I do my best to avoid being put in situations where I need to
lie), and I’m fine with other people lying because I know that sometimes it’s
just the best and easiest option (and yes, sometimes lying is the best option,
despite some people’s opinions). There are a number of smaller reasons for
this, but there is one big reason that stems from Him (for those of you who don’t
know who He is, here is a link to another story starting with the details on
that however that story does talk about a girl who committed suicide so you may not want to read the whole thing https://zanevi4.blogspot.com/2020/03/ill-never-forget-her.html). Now, this is not a pretty story but it does involve graphic
and horrific violence and death, so if you want to avoid reading that now would
be a good time to click away from this, to everyone who continues on I’m sorry
but this will likely be difficult to read.
The
first memory involved two friends who were inseparable and We spent months
studying them, learning what they liked, what they did, where they went in
their free time, and what each one was striving to succeed in. Once We learned
this He had decided he wanted to turn them against each other, to turn best
friends into enemies.
We spent weeks
setting things up, getting ready to sabotage one of the friends at an important
tryout and frame the other friend for it. It worked, and the once best friends
turned on each other, becoming bitter rivals in everything they did. They spent
a year at each other’s throats before someone finally found out that they were
tricked, though they never found out We had caused it.
This
is where things start to get really dark so this is your last chance to stop
reading. The second memory is a little bit simpler, but much worse. We were
walking home on day, and we heard a woman weakly calling out for help from the
side of the road. We looked over and whoever she was she was badly hurt, it looked
like she had been beaten and left to die, and she definitely wasn’t going to
make it through the night without help. He left her there, alone, on the side
of the road, while she begged Us for help. She was never on the news, and the
next day her body wasn’t there, but there was plenty of blood where she had been,
too much blood for anyone to have lived.
The
third, and final memory I’ll be talking about, is much worse than the others so
I’ll try to make it as quick as possible. We was walking through a town and found
a homeless man. He was just laying there, asleep, and He walked over and just started
beating him, for no reason. It was brutal, merciless, and unrelenting. I vividly
remember every second of it, the feel of bone breaking beneath Our fists, the
spray of warm blood on Our skin, the brief moments the man had to cry out
before he was gone, and how He felt nothing while doing it.
I’m
sure you’re wondering what the point is here, how are these related to why I
don’t like lying. It’s because all those memories I just shared with you have one
thing in common, they’re not real. These memories were fabricated by Him, a “final
gift” before He died. He left me dozens of false memories, all varying in their
level of cruelty and horror but all memories I could tell were clearly false.
He also left memories that I’m not sure about, ones that could be either real
or false, and then there’s also the chance he left memories that I think are
real but aren’t.
I’ve
done my best to fact check my memories using online newspapers, reports, local
stories, but there’s always the chance I’ve missed something, there’s years of
memories after all. I can’t say with 100% certainty why He left these memories
in my head, I think it’s because He knew He was dying and He thought that these
memories would make me stronger since I would be all that was left of Him. Whatever
the reason is I’m left with these terrible memories, half of them are what makes
up the nightmares I occasionally have.
I
share this because it’s part of my story and I think it needs to be told and it
shows more what He was like. I doubt that many people will find anything in
this they can relate to or anything that can help them in their daily life. I
doubt that many people will even make it to this point, and to those who have
thank you for reading, I know it probably wasn’t an easy read and I hope the
rest of your day is wonderful and bright.
